I was asked to FC a small roaming gang on sunday night. We had a x2 ruptures, x2 wolf, x1 incursus, x1 crow, x1 stabber and x1 caracal. I felt confident that we would have fun and I was right, though it didn't go too well: a HAC gang had been probing for us and they caught us with our (my) pants down with half of us in a safe spot waiting for the scouts to respond.
Just as we were leaving, this HAC gang snagged one of our ruptures - the rest had some distance already and could have warped out but we decided that since it was only one rapier we could take it. Of course, my 'well-honed' combat sense should have told me that more were on the way and indeed, two vagabonds, a jaguar and some others all piled into our little group. Needless to say, we failed to kill anything.
So scratch one rupture and incursus and wolf.
Sheepishly, I passed the FC over to someone else and warped home in my pod.
The night got worse. We lost the stabber and the second wolf due to a rather humerous episode. Instead of putting together a narrative, let me try and recraft the conversation between the stabber pilot (now FC) and the wolf pilot; moments before they were probed out.
Stabber pilot: "OK - scout, give me an update on any targets in the next system."
Crow pilot: "Roger that. On my way."
Stabber pilot: "We just sit tight and wait ok?"
Wolf and Caracal pilots: "Roger"
A minute pass.
Stabber pilot: "SHIT. My pie! My pie is burning!"
Wolf pilot: "Wha?"
Stabber pilot: "My pieeeeeeee!!!!!!"
Crow pilot: "Er..."
Stabber pilot: "Wolf is now FC. Going to rescue my pie! I think kitchen is on fire. AFK"
Line goes dead.
Wolf pilot: "Hello? Hello?"
Crow pilot: "Guys?"
Caracal pilot: "Must be an important piece of pie?"
Wolf pilot: "I want some pie too."
Crow pilot: "OK some targets in the next system, narrowing down."
Wolf pilot: "Check, check, check! Rapier de-cloaked close to us."
Sounds of auto canon fire.
Wolf pilot: "All ships scatter!"
Caracal pilot: "Going."
Wolf pilot realises that the stabber pilot is still afk, no doubt rescuing his dinner and decides to try and save the stabber pilot. Brave but the wrong decision. Both go down in flames. Another minute pass.
Stabber pilot (sounding relieved): "That was lucky, that pie was a ginsters pasty and they don't burn........what the hell?"
Wolf pilot: "Yeah...."
Caracal pilot: "How was the pie?"
Crow pilot: "Hope it was worth it."
Stabber pilot: "I lost a stabber -"
Wolf pilot: "and a wolf."
Stabber pilot: "For a ginsters pasty. Damn thing wasn't even burnt."
So the evening ended with a net loss of all but two ships, a failure in my books but every cloud has a silver lining and we did discover that the majority of the fleet (Bastards and Hellcats) had a fondness of pies, those pastry encrusted parcels of goodness, filled with a variety of meats from various parts of animals from all over the world.
My personal favourite is a STEAK and ALE pie, with lots of peas and chips on the side. Might have to do a poll and see what combinations other pirates have a hankering for.
Finally, some other pie related news: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/cornwall/7550563.stm - I hope Rodney (the stabber pilot) didn't have the misfortune to have such an addition to his pasty?
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